How a husband should treat his wife

بسم اللہ الرحمن الرحیم

How a husband should treat his wife

As in the previous article the rights of husband were discussed in detail. In this article the rights of wife are being discussing.

Usually I take a start of my article from a story or question as this article has been started from important question ‘how a husband should treat his wife?’

You might have observed many families where no respect be paid and no rules and regulations followed anyway it is not our topic to discuss their daily life routine and how to be followed but for happy and healthier family it is necessary to be respected and followed according to situation and events.

The husband has a lot of right over his wife as his wife also have rights over her husband because both are human and both be equally treated according to the Holy Quran and teachings of Hazrat Muhammad (SAW!).

The Shari’ah regards women as the spiritual and intellectual equals of men.

The main distinction it makes between them is in the physical realm based on the equitable principle of fair division of division of labour.

It allots the more strenuous work to man and makes him responsible for the maintenance of the family.

It allots the work of managing the home and the upbringing and training of children to the woman. It is the work which has the greatest importance in the task of building a healthy and prosperous society.

In Islam, there is indeed no difference between men and women as for as their relationship to Allah is concerned, as both are promised the same reward for good deeds and the same punishment for bad deeds.

In the Holy Quran the believers are addressing often uses the expression ‘believing men and women’ to emphasis the equality of men and women, in regard to their concerned duties, rights, virtues and merits. It has said:

اِنَّ  الۡمُسۡلِمِیۡنَ وَ الۡمُسۡلِمٰتِ وَ الۡمُؤۡمِنِیۡنَ وَ الۡمُؤۡمِنٰتِ وَ الۡقٰنِتِیۡنَ

وَ الۡقٰنِتٰتِ وَ الصّٰدِقِیۡنَ وَ الصّٰدِقٰتِ وَ الصّٰبِرِیۡنَ وَ الصّٰبِرٰتِ وَ الۡخٰشِعِیۡنَ

وَ الۡخٰشِعٰتِ وَ الۡمُتَصَدِّقِیۡنَ وَ الۡمُتَصَدِّقٰتِ وَ الصَّآئِمِیۡنَ وَ الصّٰٓئِمٰتِ وَ الۡحٰفِظِیۡنَ فُرُوۡجَہُمۡ

وَ الۡحٰفِظٰتِ وَ الذّٰکِرِیۡنَ اللّٰہَ کَثِیۡرًا وَّ الذّٰکِرٰتِ ۙ اَعَدَّ  اللّٰہُ   لَہُمۡ  مَّغۡفِرَۃً وَّ اَجۡرًا  عَظِیۡمًا  ﴿۳۵

Translation:-

“Indeed, the Muslim men and Muslim women, the believing men and believing women, the obedient men and obedient women, the truthful men and truthful women, the patient men and patient women, the humble men and humble women, the charitable men and charitable women,

The fasting men and fasting women, the men who guard their private parts and the women who do so, and the men who remember Allah often and the women who do so – for them Allah has prepared forgiveness and a great reward.” (33:35)

As for as rights of wife are concerned. First she should be treated in a respectable way. The detail is mentioned here:

_RESPECT_:-

Respect is a basic human right. She has right to be respected in each and every aspect of life. She should not be treated as servant because she has been honored. 

ALLAH (Subhana wo Tahala!) Said in the Holy Quran:

وَ لَقَدۡ کَرَّمۡنَا بَنِیۡۤ  اٰدَمَ

Translation:-

“And We have certainly honored the children of Adam.”   (17:70)

In another place it is said:

لَقَدۡ خَلَقۡنَا الۡاِنۡسَانَ فِیۡۤ  اَحۡسَنِ تَقۡوِیۡمٍ ۫

Translation:-

“We have certainly created man in the best of stature.”  (95:4)

_JUSTICE_:-

Without justice a society leads to destruction.A family without justice falls down in destruction.A company without justice can not be reached at the top and can’t play a leading role. 

Justice is a basic human right so it should be given to each and every one.As for as husband and wife are concerned they are obliged to be treated with equal rights.

The LORD OF THE WORLD said in the Holy Quran:

قُلۡ اَمَرَ رَبِّیۡ  بِالۡقِسۡطِ

Translation:-

“Say, [O Muhammad], “My Lord has ordered justice.”  (7:29)

_FORBEARANCE_:-

The mistakes of wife should be tolerated. When she commits any sort of mistake, a husband should try his best level to make an understand her and forbear. As it is said in the Holy Quran:

لَاۤ اِکۡرَاہَ فِی الدِّیۡنۙ قَدۡ تَّبَیَّنَ الرُّشۡدُ مِنَ الۡغَیِّ ۚ فَمَنۡ یَّکۡفُرۡ

بِالطَّاغُوۡتِ وَ یُؤۡمِنۡۢ بِاللّٰہِ فَقَدِ اسۡتَمۡسَکَ بِالۡعُرۡوَۃِ الۡوُثۡقٰی ٭ لَا انۡفِصَامَ  لَہَا ؕ وَ اللّٰہُ سَمِیۡعٌ عَلِیۡمٌ

Translation:-

“There shall be no compulsion in [acceptance of] the religion. The right course has become clear from the wrong. So whoever disbelieves in Tag hut and believes in Allah has grasped the most trustworthy handhold with no break in it. And Allah is Hearing and Knowing.”      (2:256)

GUIDELINES AND FORGIVENESS

A wife has right to be guided and forgiven. Being a Human it is possible to commit a mistake but being a husband you should treat your wife in a passionate and reasonable way and she should be treated well and been forgiven.

_PROTECTION OF LIFE_:-

Islam gives right of the protection of life, property and honor.

_RIGHTS TO BE LOOKED AFTER_ :-

It is one of the fundamental rights that he should be taken care of by his wife, children and others.

Besides all these there are other many rights of wife but all these are not possible to be discussed here because it lasts time.

As a wife what Islam has given protocol and full pledged authorities. Let’s have a glance.

*As a wife*:-

Marriage in Islam:-

 Marriage in Islam is based on mutual peace, love and compassion and not just the mere satisfying of human sexual desires. Among the most impressive verses in the Quran about marriage is given under-mentioned:

وَ مِنۡ اٰیٰتِہٖۤ  اَنۡ خَلَقَ لَکُمۡ مِّنۡ اَنۡفُسِکُمۡ اَزۡوَاجًا لِّتَسۡکُنُوۡۤا اِلَیۡہَا

وَ جَعَلَ بَیۡنَکُمۡ  مَّوَدَّۃً  وَّ رَحۡمَۃً ؕ اِنَّ  فِیۡ ذٰلِکَ لَاٰیٰتٍ  لِّقَوۡمٍ  یَّتَفَکَّرُوۡنَ 

Translation:-

“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.”    (30:21)

B) Right To Accept Or Reject The Marriage Proposals:-

The woman has the right to accept or reject marriage proposals. According to the Islamic Law, women cannot be forced to marry anyone without their consent.

C) Maintenance and Protection of wife:-

 As above mentioned the husband is responsible for the maintenance, protection and overall leadership of the family within the framework of consultation and kindness. The Holy Prophet Hazrat Muhammad SAW! instructed Muslims regarding women:

“I commend you to be good to women.” And 

“The best among you are those who are best to their wives.”

The Quran urges to husband to be kind and considerate to their wives, even if a wife falls out of favour with her husband or disinclination for her arises within him:

یٰۤاَیُّہَا الَّذِیۡنَ اٰمَنُوۡا لَا یَحِلُّ لَکُمۡ اَنۡ تَرِثُوا النِّسَآءَ کَرۡہًا ؕ

وَ لَا تَعۡضُلُوۡہُنَّ لِتَذۡہَبُوۡا بِبَعۡضِ مَاۤ اٰتَیۡتُمُوۡہُنَّ  اِلَّاۤ اَنۡ یَّاۡتِیۡنَ بِفَاحِشَۃٍ مُّبَیِّنَۃٍ ۚ

وَ عَاشِرُوۡہُنَّ بِالۡمَعۡرُوۡفِ ۚ فَاِنۡ کَرِہۡتُمُوۡہُنَّ فَعَسٰۤی اَنۡ تَکۡرَہُوۡا شَیۡئًا وَّ یَجۡعَلَ اللّٰہُ فِیۡہِ خَیۡرًا کَثِیۡرًا

Translation

“…O you who have believed, it is not lawful for you to inherit women by compulsion. And do not make difficulties for them in order to take [back] part of what you gave them unless they commit a clear immorality.

And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them – perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.” (Surah Nisa:19)

From the above mentioned ayaat it is crystal cleared regarding life issues with wife so try to think about it.

*Assignment for you*:-

Think 10 minutes each day all alone for 7 days.

Note:-

This article is all research based. If you find any sort of mistake you are requested to convey your message through given emails. And don’t forget to share.

JAZAK ALLAH (SWT) Thanks!

Written BySyed Ihtisham Ul Haq Bin Mulvi Muh Khwaja Din

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